7.4 Place modifiers with care
The modifiers most usually misplaced are of four varieties:
- The single word only
- Phrases beginning with -ing words, called participles
- Clauses beginning with the relative pronouns which or that
- Phrases beginning with with
For more theory on modifiers, click here.
Examples
1. This step is only necessary when the directories which contain the working files have been altered.
Rewrite: This step is necessary only when the directories which contain the working files have been altered.
2. ABC expects to receive a bridge loan from Bank of America which will be used to fund the rehabilitation costs.
Rewrite: ABC expects Bank of America to issue a bridge loan which will be used to fund the rehabilitation costs.
3. Benefits of Data Architecture (data integrity, consistency, and efficiency) can only be achieved by conforming to a suitable Data Architecture.
Rewrite: Benefits of Data Architecture (data integrity, consistency, and efficiency) can be achieved only by conforming to a suitable Data Architecture.
4. In July of 2000, the official version of Ace DataKing will be released which Acme will be using.
Rewrite: In July of 2000, Ace will release the official version of DataKing which Acme will be using.
5. On more than one occasion I delivered documentation to the client project teams or management that was above their expectations.
Rewrite: On more than one occasion I delivered to the client project teams or management documentation that was above their expectations.
6. By recreating the lab it also allowed us to gain an even better understanding of the technical infrastructure of the test lab we supported.
Rewrite: By recreating the lab, we gained an even better understanding of the technical infrastructure of the test lab we supported.
7. By not being limited to a set number of hours or a specific job title, much more can be accomplished throughout the scope of a project.
Rewrite: By not being limited to a set number of hours or a specific job title, one can accomplish much more throughout the scope of a project.
8. The company has substantial liquidity with $24MM in cash on the balance sheet and $300MM in availability under the revolver. Furthermore, Ace has ready access to the capital markets with public debt ratings of BBB- and Baa3 by S&P and Moody's respectively as of August 1999.
Rewrite; The company has substantial liquidity made up of $24MM in cash on the balance sheet and $300MM in availability under the revolver. Furthermore, Ace's public debt ratings of BBB- and Baa3 by S&P and Moody's respectively as of August 1999 give it ready access to the capital markets
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